the old time, would never be the same

i wonder if all of this time, it was just a lie.. sometimes, when you being friends with somebody, you could tell wether it is a lie or not. i wished i never go through this kind of things, but i was so unlucky that i got caught in this situations. what should i think, what should i react, what should i say, what can i do is just stand still and reflect myself. keep wondering, would help i guess ;( the person that i love all of this while is hating me so much. what can do? nothing! im just gonna hurt myself if i keep asking the same ques, because the answer would be the same which is NOTHING! 

dear Love,

Dia, mesti ada bila aku perlukan dia. kadang kadang tak perlu di panggil, dia dah datang mendapat aku. Rasa aku, dia ada perasaan yang sama aku rasa dalam hati ini, tapi entahlah.. siapa yang tau. Dia lah tempat aku bemanja, kadang bila ada masalah, akan aku ceritakan padanya, walau aku tahu dia langsung tak mengerti. Tapi kalau di beri pertanyaan, siapakah pendengar yang paling setia? jawapannya adalah dia. Sepanjang hampir setengah tahun kami bersama, tak pernah ku lihat dia senyum, tapi aku tahu jauh di sudut hatinya.. dia gembira bersama aku! Kami banyak menghabiskan masa bersama, selalu menaiki kereta bersama, menunggang motor pon bersama.. haha tetapi dia tak boleh memandu, jikalau aku menunggang motor, dia hanya membonceng sahaja.. Kami juga selalu merakam video bersama, tetapi yang selalu beria adalah aku, bukannya dia. Kelakar sungguh bila teringat waktu itu. Sehinggalah, tanggal 23 januari 2016 dia pergi meninggal kan aku.. Pergi untuk selamanya.. Kadang aku terfikir, di mana tempat aku hendak bermanja selepas ini? Masih aku ingat kali terakhir kami berjumpa, dia terlalu manja denganku. Tak pernah dia begitu, sehingga aku bertanya padanya, kenapa manja sangat ni? haha. Sungguh aku tak sangka, rupanya apa yang dia cuba hendak smpaikan adalah tanda pemergian dirinya. Yang dia tak akan kembali lagi, jadi kerana itulah dia hendak bermanja denganku, kerna tidak ada lagi kesempatan itu selepas ini.. Setelah difikirkan kembali, sebak hati ini kembali lagi, air mata aku mula menitis sekali lagi tanpa henti.. Di mana tempat aku hendak meluahkan perasaan selepas ini? Sudah terlalu banyak aku mengalirkan air mata.. Tapi aku redha, Tuhan lebih sayangkan dia. Siapakah aku untuk melawan takdir Yang Maha Esa.. Aku akan sentiasa berdoa, agar dipertemukan dengannya di akhirat kelak. Semoga kau bahagia di alam sana wahai kesayanganku, Rain.. 

A Friend is need is a Friend indeed

Dah berdekad rasanya tak tulis entry, so today teringin nak tulis something. 

I choose to write about, “a friend is need is a friend indeed“. We need true friends in our life. A real or true friend is always willing to help us when we need them. At the same time, it is our responsibility to remain helpful towards our friends. I know, some of us have so much friends in life, but do you really thing that they are the true friends? 

 l have this one friend, dia ni roommate aku jugak. Apa yang aku paling suka pasal dia adalah her advices. Yes, aku admit yang kadang-kadang dia ni bangang jugak perangainya, but when dia serious, memang lain! Why i want to write bout her? huhhh sebab, kami baru je ada serious conversation tadi. I was asking her about fate, and i choosed to tell her about my problems. she aswered me, yes she did! And she did with something that can really open my mind. "Never being with a guy that only loves you, but dont want to marry you" 

Bila pikir kan balik, yes its true. There is no time for cinta cinta monyet ni lagi, its time to be serious in this kind of matter. Walaupon perkara ni masih awal, but yes we should think bout it. And thanks to her, i could see what is right, and what is wrong. Whenever, i've choosed to love someone, i did be carefull. Thanks friend ;-) you're trully a friend indeed. Me heart you! 

crush

sometimes we should not dream on 

sometimes we should put our limits 

sometimes we should be able to control ourselves 

sometimes we should know that love is hurting 

and i know it's hurting me now.. :( 

A Blessing In Disguise

There are many valuable things in life, but friendship may be one of the most important. To survive life without the experience of friendship, is life without dwelling. Human interaction is a necessity to subsist, but developed friendships are essential to the successful well being of anyone. I value friendship more than the most expensive material things in this world. I set about making friendships as far as my memory could make from my kindergarten classmates.

 I have a story about 

A Blessing In Disguise. This began when I was 19. In that respect is one group of acquaintances which I hate the most because there were very irritating. We always pretend to be decent to each other when we met, but the truth hiding behind us. *evil laugh

It goes like that till someone came and add fuel to the fire. She told them that I was a bad influence. She said that I told and ask her to do bad things. So, they began to hate me more. This last till they find out who’s the truth evil. We started to go from zero. I became their roommate and the things got better. They were really nice, it's just me who hasn’t seen the angel side of them since the very beginning. The real friendship started to build on. Who said that a real enemy can’t be our real friends? 

Therefore, don't count your chickens 

before they hatch,

know your enemy first before you start to hate them. 

a leopard cant change it spots

hey mr blogger, how are you? fine? you're feeling sad? let me entertain you with this one story about a human who never give up to full fill her dream.

firstly, let me introduce herself, she is a girl from a village.. she born in a poor family,she had a dream to be a rich and successful person one day but  she always heard " a leopard cant change it spots" which meant that you cant change yourself, you're who you're now. but she never trusted on that, she know that she can change her life to be a better person. she learned with a full heart, cause she wants to strive for the best. in a primary school, she got flying colours, but because of her family condition, she cant even continued her studies in high school. i remember when she said "a few of friends, came to my house and asked me to join them to school, but my father asked them to go and leave her alone. she cried for a few days and keep forcing his father to sent her to school. until one day, his father said with a soft voice, " if you really wants to go to high school, take this knife and kill me.. because i cant even effort it.."  started from that moment she never mentioned about school in front of his father again, but she promised to herself that she wants to make sure that her children will going to school and learn until they become somebody. here, i learned that, not all the dreams and wishes will come true, but it is we ourselves who can create the dream. you  must be curious and wants to know who is she right? she is my MOTHER, my beloved mother. i love you mom, i promised to full fill your dream to become a successful person one day. inshallah